My dearest friend is gone, having died in her sleep on Wednesday morning the 25th June 2008. I am finding it incredibly hard to believe she is gone and that I can’t see or speak to her again. She was my dearest friend and the most important person in my entire life. It is hard to find words to describe the ache that I feel in my heart and mind and the massive void Rebecca’s death will leave in my life. She meant so much to me and she will always mean so much to me – what an amazing privilege it was for me to have known this incredible girl with the endearing and enduring smile.
I first met Rebecca in about January 2004 at Hawkins Masonic Village. It was her first job in nursing I believe and fuelled within her a desire and a passion for being a nurse. She had the respect of her fellow staff members immediately and engaged us all with her determination to be the very best nurse she could be, along with her wholehearted empathy for those she cared for. Even from these early days in her nursing career Rebecca showed qualities that proved the potential that was within her to be a great nurse, as well as a great person. Sadly we have been left without the quality nurse and person she would most certainly have become.
In those early days of 2004 Rebecca attended one of my fire safety lectures at Hawkins Masonic Village and I remember the attention she gave and that smile that emblazoned the room. She was a beautiful young woman who personified happiness in a very real and personal manner. Her desire for life and joy of living was captured in the smile that adorned her face in those first moments that I experienced the pleasure that was knowing my friend Rebecca.
I did not set out to become a friend of Rebecca’s, yet it was the overtures of her bubbly friendliness that drew me towards her and destined me to having a friend that I will cherish for the rest of my days. Though a friendship I did not immediately seek, her friendship soon became one that I would never want to part with and she soon became the most important person in my life.
At that very time when I met Rebecca I would have been quite happy to have signed out of life. I wanted the earth to stop spinning so I could step off and it was quite within the realm of possibility that I would have done so. Rebecca saved me and returned to me a desire to go on living. Her engaging personality enabled me to see the possibilities of life once again and we soon became close friends.
As the closest of friends with the greatest regard for each other, we still had our differences and difficulties as friends. Yet beneath the sometimes tumultuous circumstances of our friendship there was nothing that could separate us as friends. We were there for each other and life’s troubles became the melting pot for a life long friendship that would mean the world to me and more.
There were many times when Rebecca came to me for support through the greatest of personal difficulties and it was the same the other way as well. Our bond was cemented in the fires of hardship and a friendship forged that would endure all things cast in our way.
There was so much more to Rebecca then her smile and seemingly perpetual happiness. She struggled with what life threw at her, yet she never gave up. There were many great personal battles fought and many still being fought. She had her demons as we all do, yet it was a testimony to the quality of who Rebecca was that she continued to be a young woman who made an impact on all her knew her for good. There was potential in Rebecca to be far more than she already was and I looked forward to seeing that develop from the bud into full bloom. How tragic it is that the developing flower has been plucked at such an early stage in her development as a person. What a wonderful woman she would have become. Rebecca Morris was there in development and the fruit of who she was was beginning to be known by those who knew her best.
Rebecca was a star in the making, as well as being a star already. I have known no-one else that could be what Rebecca was and what she was becoming. Greatness loomed in the being of my friend and I longed to see her come out of the shadows and be seen in all her glory, to be known for who she truly was without the fears that so often plagued her inner peace and being.
I thank God I knew her and for what I could see beginning to form beneath the surface and for the future life she would live. Now I am heartbroken by the fact that my friend’s life has been so tragically cut short. My sorrow rends my heart and crushes my spirit. All I want to do is somehow fix everything and bring her back, but this time I cannot do it. The desire is more than there but the ability is greatly lacking. I have no power, no words, no nothing that can bring my friend back to me, to her friends and her family. I am so devastated by the loss of my friend and my heart’s sorrow cannot be silenced or stopped.
Time may ease the felt pain of my sorrow, but it will not remove the void that can never be filled by another. Rebecca was my friend and I will never forget her. She meant the world to me and continues to do so. I cannot forget her and I will not.
How much those times I spent with her are now to be guarded and embraced as cherished and precious moments which time will never prize from my heart and mind. They have become Rebecca to me and I will go to them when I need to spend time with her again. You will always be with me as long as I cherish these memories and I will never forget to do so, for I can never forget you.
Rebecca, you were my friend and I will never forget what you meant to me and who you were. My friend, forever. Thank you for being so.