EDITORIAL NOTE: This post includes satire and although the actual base story is true, my comments should be seen as satire and do not accurately portray my viewpoints.
At last, that great agent of Satan, Mickey Mouse, has been revealed for all to see. We have all long expected that such beings as Mickey Mouse, Donald Duck and Elma Fudd are secret agents working for Satan.
How better off would we be if these characters had been eliminated years ago? Surely legislation must be passed to outlaw these characters, with shoot on sight allowances being made for gun owners, especially in the United States. If all gun owners were allowed onto the streets to take out any Mickey Mouses, Donald Ducks, Elma Fudds and all other such characters, how much better would we all be?
Oh to be rid of Ronald McDonald all of our dieting problems would be finished and one of Satan’s great weapons against mankind would come to an end! No more gherkins to haunt us as we eat. No more fear of our burgers being swept off by a hamburgler! No more large Grimace-like creatures to scare children!
All thanks to Sheikh Mohamed al-Munajid the former Saudi diplomat to the United States for telling us that household mice and their animated counterparts must be rubbed out! Mickey Mouse is one of Satan’s soldiers according to the Sheikh.
If only the United Nations could form a committee to oversee the elimination of these demon soldiers!
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